Liberal leadership analysis

This is Creekside, live-blogging the first ballot results of the Liberal leadership race as they are announced on CBC TV.
We now take you !live! to Peter Mansbridge, sitting behind a desk in the empty and cavernous convention hall. He has just announced the results will be in momentarily....he is looking them up on the internet....and now he is reading them aloud to the TV viewing audience.
Borg - 29.3%....Rae - 20.3%....Dion - 17.8%....Kennedy - 17.7%
This has been Creekside, live-blogging CBC coverage ...

Of course all the really important work is done behind the scenes.
For instance, 2,000 bright red condoms bearing the Young Liberals of Canada logo will be given out throughout the weekend [Ed. note : Surely that isn't going to be enough] and a resolution to lower the age of consent for anal sex from 18 to 16 was debated at the social policy workshop. [Ed. note : Surely they won't get it through on time.]
You think I'm making this up. Nuh-uh, here you go.

Unfortunately, although it passed, the anal sex resolution did not make it onto the list of the big three priority issues to be debated by the entire convention. What a shame. I was so looking forward to seeing the approving delegates leaping up and down and waving their placards and cheering enthusiastically in an anal attentive sort of way.