Monday, July 02, 2007

Gays cause more flooding

A couple of guys wearing dresses and waving wands explained recent flooding in England and Wales as God's judgment on teh gay.

The Bishop of Carlisle says that laws that have undermined marriage, including the introduction of pro-gay legislation, have provoked God to act by sending the storms that have left thousands of people homeless.
"This is a strong and definite judgment ... "We are reaping the consequences of our moral degradation..."
"In the Bible, institutional power is referred to as 'the beast', which sets itself up to control people and their morals. Our government has been playing the role of God in saying that people are free to act as they want," he said, adding that the introduction of recent pro-gay laws highlighted its determination to undermine marriage.

"The sexual orientation regulations [which give greater rights to gays] are part of a general scene of permissiveness. We are in a situation where we are liable for God's judgment, which is intended to call us to repentance."
He expressed his sympathy for those who have been hit by the weather, but said that the problem with "environmental judgment is that it is indiscriminate".

I see. Your sky monster can pinpoint individual acts of sex you don't care for but unfortunately is unable to respond to them with anything more refined than a broad brush flooding-thousands-of-homeless. Bit of a serious PR drawback for an omnipotent deity, isn't it? I mean it certainly doesn't make your job any easier, does it, Bish?
The Bishop of Liverpool : "People no longer see natural disasters as an act of God. However, we are now reaping what we have sown. If we live in a profligate way then there are going to be consequences," said the bishop, who has previously been seen as a future Archbishop of Canterbury or York.

Oh yes, by all means, do let's give that guy a fancier dress and a bigger wand.

But getting back to this business about "institutional power" and "government playing God" and "the beast which sets itself up to control people and their morals".
You bishops just aren't getting the blatant irony here, are you?
Bad bishops. No theocracy for you.

Sitting here on Canada's birthday, I'm grateful to live in a country in which this kind of dimwitted asshattery in our major religious leaders is just not publicly tolerated. Oh some of them might think God hates teh gay, but for the most part they know better than to tar their skymonster with it.
Happy birthday, Canada.

Blog Against Theocracy
Blue Gal's : A memo to non-believers
Previous Easter BAT cartoons here and here


West End Bob said...

So I'm assuming that the drought we're living with here in the Southeast is retribution for our immoral lifestyle, eh?

Crapola . . . .

BTW, loved the fancier dress and a bigger wand line, Alison!

Q said...

This is great news.
Let's start hiring gays to temporarily occupy drought areas around the world, especially since God sits by in silence while people suffer.

Anonymous said...

Man, those totally straight, dress-wearing celibate marriage experts are a surly bunch.

God's certainly got piss-poor aim. He punished New Orleans for their evil gay, but missed the French Quarter. What about Denmark? Those sneaky Danes have had civil unions since the 80's. But nothing's ever happened to Denmark.
Perhaps god meant the tsunami for Denmark but hit the Indian Ocean by accident? I'm sure the bishops can explain Denmark's lack of celestial retribution. ;)

MgS said...

this kind of dimwitted asshattery in our major religious leaders is just not publicly tolerated

Oh, I don't know:

- Bishop Fred Henry
- Rev. Stephen Boissoin
- Dr. C. McVety

All come to mind as producing some pretty amazing asshattery couched in the language of faith.

Alison said...

Grog : Agreed McVety gets too much airtime, but my point was none of them get state-sanctioned creds in the form of a position like Archbish of Canterbury. And even McVety pulls his punches when given a national microphone --plus no dress. ;-)

Ali : LOL. Someone did a map of gay/non-gay New Orleans making that point. Can't remember who now.
A bit like the one showing all the countries AlQaeda has no interest in attacking for some strange as yet undetermined reason.

Q & WEB : I'm seeing a business opportunity here - Raptcha Captcha, for all your one-stop scapegoatin' needs. Just like CUSO but with way jazzier shoes.

Unknown said...

Wow, gays can control the weather! What other superpowers do they have?

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